The Breastfeeding Journey

Salam

           When it came to buying baby's stuff, the first thing that popped up in my mind was a breast pump. I do not know for sure as of why I'm so keen about breastfeeding even before I was pregnant. It could be from the blog I read. The journey of mothers out there who continue to breastfeed their babies even after they have returned to work just got me inspired. So when I found out I was pregnant, I started to further educate myself on breastfeeding.

At that point I made myself clear that I'm gonna breastfeed my son until he is two years old in syaa Allah and will never settle down with formula milk whatever it takes. Sounds easy, right? But it's not. Juggling between breastfeeding and working requires a huge commitment.

Believe me, once you get back to work after a confinement period, the only thing that wanders in your mind is the milk supply. How many oz for how many days? How many packs of milk left in the freeze? How much more do I need to pump to catch up with my baby's feeding pace? This is the struggle that I think only breastfeeding mommies will understand.

'You're not producing enough milk? Then keep pumping'. That's what they say. If and only if they know it isn't about the frequency of pumping alone. There will be a certain period where the milk supply itself goes down for some reasons (stress or hormonal changes).

In that case, I need to double up my effort. But it doesn't get easy with loads of house chores awaiting and the baby who wants to keep latching most of the time. I need to get to bed late night and sometimes wake up in the middle of the night just to pump because those are the only times I can do it peacefully without any distractions. As of now while I'm working, one session of pumping in the morning, two or three sessions at work and one last session before going to sleep would be enough for Muhammad's everyday supply. 

Despite of the tiredness, it gives me a full satisfaction knowing my baby is getting his best level of nutrition out of my hard work. Just what else is better than a breastmilk, right? That is the only motivation to keep me get going. And because of that too, I even took a month of unpaid leave to build up my milk stocks. Sacrificing a month income was a worth investment at that time so that my baby was getting enough and I could leave him in peace.

At the end, we need to remind ourselves that everything comes from Allah. I always worried about my milk supply. There was this one time it went down drastically. I was so stressed out and cried while pumping *erghh drama.

But my husband kept repeating, 'Your milk is a rizq from Allah. Stop worrying and make a dua. In syaa Allah whatever amount you produced will be enough for Muhammad. Sebab kenyang bukan terletak pada kuantiti tapi pada barakah. Susu yang banyak tak semestinya mengenyangkan. Kadang-kadang yang sikit itu lah yang buat Muhammad kenyang kalau padanya ada berkat'.

So yeah.. Those words wiped all my tears away. It just took a second to get you back on the track with the right motivation :)

My pillar of strength

Till the, Assalamualaikum.